“It is useless to attempt to reason a man out of a thing he was never reasoned into”

Jonathan Swift
"The Democrats have moved to the right, and the right has moved into a mental hospital." - Bill Maher
"The city is crowded my friends are away and I'm on my own
It's too hot to handle so I gotta get up and go

It's a cruel ... cruel summer"

Saturday, June 07, 2008


Panhandle Truth Squad would like to apologize for the increased accuracy of our dispatches from the Democratic State Convention. Unfortunately, we have managed only the occasional exaggeration for comic effect (as when I claimed to have been thrown to the ground by a volunteer). We know that our readers have come to expect a certain standard of satire, snark, parody, and general making-crap-upness. At the state convention, we have failed to meet that standard.

We have no excuses, except to whine that the pressures of writing quickly in real time while drinking heavily have gotten to us. Under such pressures, it is simply easy to just write down the truth, and that is what we have done; we are nothing if not lazy. As a result, this experience has only increased our respect for the Amarillo Globe-Republican. Even while putting out an entire newspaper a day, its reporters and editors never fail to sanitize the news for their Republican readership. It is an amazing feat.